The Health and Life Mixing Bowl

Is "Selfish" A Bad Word for Moms?

A post for all the wonderful mothers who read The Health and Life Mixing Bowl....

We teach our children that being selfish is not nice. “Share your toys with your sister!” “Give someone else a turn!” “Be generous!” But is being selfish all that bad?

My daughter is an only child. When she was very young, sharing was a huge challenge for her. Frustrated by her unwillingness to “play nicely”, I spoke with a friend who told me that being selfish is not always a bad thing. She pointed out that a reasonable degree of selfishness gives children a stronger sense of self.  It also heightens their awareness of who they are and what is important to them and it allows them to stand up for their needs, wants and desires. Letting a child exercise a little selfishness does not mean freeing their inner narcissistic, egotistical tyrant, but it means giving them a reasonable amount of “me” time and making it okay to do so.

So I listened to the advice of my friend and decided to experiment with this “no sharing” thing. It was a little weird at a play date to announce that it was okay for my daughter not to share, but my shifted perspective on selfishness made the decision a little easier. Besides, I was instilling the value of “the world does not revolve around you” and teaching her the importance of being sensitive to the needs of others. Fortunately, the “no sharing” experiment did not destroy my daughter’s life and I can proudly report that I have a very smart, self-confident, well-adjusted nine year old.  I admire her ability to set personal boundaries while remaining sensitive and highly responsive to others.

Drawing parallels to motherhood, I believe moms who exercise a reasonable and responsible degree of selfishness make better caregivers. Euphemistically speaking, a little bit of “me” time does a mom good! Being a little “selfish” helps us set boundaries, gives us a stronger sense of self, and allows us to remain empathetic and responsive to those we care for. Most importantly, “me” time keeps us connected to our whole self, not just our role of mother.

Here are four things moms should find “me” time for:

Regular exercise. Exercise helps to reduce stress, keeps you in great shape and gives you more energy, a rare commodity for moms. Motherhood is a tough, demanding, and unforgiving job and every bit of energy helps.  Without exception, all moms should make “me” time for exercise and movement!

Leisure and play. Even if it lacks extravagance, moms need time to themselves to enjoy life away from the kids. Too many moms make the mistake of making the children’s leisure time their leisure time. Engage in a hobby. Go get a manicure. Spend an afternoon with your girlfriends. Close the bedroom door and take a bubble bath. Do not wait until the kids are grown and out of the house.  By this time you might forget who you really are outside of your role as mother.  Let the fun, excitement and adventure begin now!

Preventive screenings and exams. The importance of getting regular check-ups cannot be over emphasized and being busy with the kids is a dangerous excuse.  Start by finding out what preventive exams and screenings you need and when you need them.  Visit this site:

Screening Tests and Immunizations Guidelines for Women

Reflection time. Being a mom can sometimes feel like a non-stop flight to nowhere. Forget the guilt trip when it is time to put on the brakes! Recharging your battery and reflecting on your role as mother can help you gain a sense of control. Take the time to reconnect with your choice to become a mother. Here are some soul-searching and grounding questions that can bring joy and purpose back to the plight:

What do you ultimately want for your children?

What is most important about your role of mother?

At the end of the day, what is most important to your family?

When moms take the time to get their physical, emotional and spiritual needs met, they can fully give to others. But the real prize in exercising “me” time lies in nourishing innate gifts, talents and resources. By creating a setting in which you can grow, develop and evolve, you can make a wonderful contribution to yourself and to those for whom you care for. After all, isn’t that what motherhood is all about?

This post is also featured at Go Workout Mom.  Thanks, Cindy!

According to Your World Wednesday

Bring your knowledge, insight, and spirit of contribution as we collectively support each other in experiencing a higher level of wellness.  According to Your World Wednesday is a chance for you to sound off by responding to an inquiry of the week.  Feel free to leave your contact information and/or website/blog address.  And please share this with others!  The more co-activity, the better!  A reminder that each comment will be reviewed before it is posted.  This week's inquiry:

How are you simplifying the holidays?

Take a Risk

Each Monday The Health and Life Mixing Bowl will start off the week with an inspirational "click".  Found something you would like to share?  Email me!

Make it a great week!

Here is the YouTube link.

Nutrition with a Twist: The Leftover Turkey

The Turkey, originally uploaded by craigjam.

Have the basic rules for eating healthier got you stuck in a rut? Each week, The Health and Life Mixing Bowl will serve up some good stuff to expand your nutritional options and perhaps ignite a genuine interest in eating better. Read more about these posts here.

Here is a leftover turkey recipe that caught my eye:

Stir-fried Turkey with Ginger and Cashews

Dissolve 2 tablespoons of cornstarch in 2 tablespoons light soy sauce mixed with 1/3 cup oyster sauce and the juice of a lemon. Stir fry 4 cups roasted turkey meat cut in bite size pieces in 2 tablespoons oil with 2 tablespoons minced fresh ginger root for 1 minute. Add 1 can (14-ounces) chicken broth and bring to a boil. Add the cornstarch mixture and cook until thickened. Toss in 1 clove minced garlic, 2 sliced scallions and 1 cup whole cashews.

Sound yummy?  Visit  Mealtime.org  for 39 additional ways to enjoy your leftover turkey.  According to the USDA, you can safely freeze cooked turkey for up to four months.  Enjoy!

Can An Attitude of Gratitude Keep You Healthy?

Ever heard of the Research Project on Gratitude and Thanksgiving?  Conducted by Dr. Michael McCollough, of Southern Methodist University in Dallas, Texas, and Dr. Robert Emmons, of the University of California at Davis, this study showed that gratitude plays a significant role in a person's sense of well-being.  The study revealed that people who express gratefulness on a regular basis benefit from the following: 

• Higher levels of alertness, enthusiasm, determination
• More optimism and energy
• Less depression and stress
• More likely to help others
• More motivated to exercise regularly
• Made more progress toward personal goals
• More likely to feel loved

The study also showed that gratefulness begets gratefulness encouraging a positive cycle of reciprocal kindness. 

Here are a few quick tips for developing an attitude of gratitude:

• Make a note of three things that go well everyday and why.  This exercise was devised by Martin Seligman, the guru of the positive psychology movement.
• Identify your strengths and use them in new and creative ways.  Studies show that the average person uses their strengths 37 percent of the time.  Try going to strengthfinders to find yours.
• Show gratitude in unexpected ways.  Write someone a thank you letter.  Show kindness toward a stranger.  Send someone flowers.
• Commit to small acts of kindness.  Put the toilet seat down instead of complaining about it. Do the dishes when it's not your turn.  Fill the gas tank up just because (speaking from personal experience here...it really works!)   
• Light a candle. Visit gratefulness.org and light a candle to express your gratefulness.  You can visit as much as you wish.  Look for my candle initialed "tlh".

According to Your World Wednesday

Bring your knowledge, insight, and spirit of contribution as we collectively support each other in experiencing a higher level of wellness.  According to Your World Wednesday is a chance for you to sound off by responding to an inquiry of the week.  Feel free to leave your contact information and/or website/blog address.  And please share this with others!  The more co-activity, the better!  A reminder that each comment will be reviewed before it is posted.  This week's inquiry (a repeat from last week):

What has gratefulness brought you?

Operation Gratitude

Each Monday The Health and Life Mixing Bowl will start off the week with an inspirational "click".  Found something you would like to share?  Email me!

During this week of gratitude, let's not forget those who have sacrificed their lives for the rest of us.  The sacrifice is great.  It involves an entire life shift, not just a temporary separation from what is familiar.  Let's remember these fine women and men.  Make it a grateful week! 

Nutrition with a Twist: Tasty and Tantalizing Tofurky

Tofurky, originally uploaded by ashe-villain.

Have the basic rules for eating healthier got you stuck in a rut? Each week, The Health and Life Mixing Bowl will serve up some good stuff to expand your nutritional options and perhaps ignite a genuine interest in eating better. Read more about these posts here.

What is made from a tofu-wheat gluten blend, is known for its incredible taste and texture, and looks like a light brown nerf football?  It looks like a turkey, but it's not!  It's Tofurky!  Thanks to Seth Tibbot, owner and founder of Turtle Island Foods, manufacturer of the famous Tofurky, vegetarians everywhere can rejoice at the Thanksgiving dinner table.

 

Seth Tibbot and Turtle Island have come a long way from their humble beginnings of producing tempeh in an incubator made with an old refrigerator heated by a string of Christmas tree lights.  After selling their 1 millionth Tofurky last year, Turtle Island was selected by Inc. Magazine as one of the fastest growing small businesses in the nation.  Turtle Island's success is coupled with a strong commitment to ecological responsibility. They prohibit the use of genetically modified organisms, ban products made from hexane extraction and receive all of their electricity from the Blue Sky renewable energy project of the northwestern United States. In addition, most of Turtle Island's food is organically grown, their paperboard packaging is recycled and a certain percentage of each year's Tofurky sales is donated to an environmental charity.

 

Depending on where you live, you can find Tofurky at Trader Joes, Whole Foods and Wild Oats Markets.  Another option is to purchase the complete Tofurky Feast from Turtle Island that includes one large Tofurky Roast, Tofurky Giblets & Mushroom Gravy, Cranberry Apple Potato Dumplings, Herbed Brown Tofurky Wild Rice Stuffing, and Tofurky Jurky Wishstix.  The meal is 100% vegan, cooks in about one hour, and serves four.

 

Here is a great recipe for Yam Good Cranberry Tofurky from the Turtle Island website:

1 can (15oz.) cranberry jelly
1 clove mashed garlic
3 minced green onions
2 tablespoons minced crystallized ginger
1 tablespoon dry mustard
1 tablespoon soy sauce
1 tablespoon sesame oil
2 tablespoons freshly grated orange peel
½ cup coconut cream
½ cup chopped pecans

Put cranberry jelly into a medium sized bowl. Mix in all the remaining ingredients, set aside.

1 pkg. (1lb. 10oz.) Tofurky Roast
1 can (22oz.) yams packed in syrup & drained

Preheat oven to 350 degrees. Remove thawed roast from plastic wrap. Place roast in the sauce mixture, turn until coated. Place roast on a large piece of foil. Arrange yams around roast. Pour remaining sauce over all. Wrap roast in the foil & place in a shallow baking pan. Bake for 45 minutes. Remove roast from foil. Slice into serving pieces. Place a piece of roast on a plate, surround with yams and drizzle remaining sauce over all.

A 4 oz serving of Tofurky roast has 190 calories, 5 grams of fat, and 26 grams of protein.

Makes 4 servings. 

Happy Thanksgiving!

According to Your World Wednesday

Bring your knowledge, insight, and spirit of contribution as we collectively support each other in experiencing a higher level of wellness.  According to Your World Wednesday is a chance for you to sound off by responding to an inquiry of the week.  Feel free to leave your contact information and/or website/blog address.  And please share this with others!  The more co-activity, the better!  A reminder that each comment will be reviewed before it is posted.  This week's inquiry:

What has gratitude brought you? 

The Art of Expressing Gratitude

Each Monday The Health and Life Mixing Bowl will start off the week with an inspirational "click".  Found something you would like to share?  Email me!

I will always remember my third grade teacher.  She was a sweet, caring, and funny woman who took a genuine interest in me as a student and as a person.  If you asked me what act of kindness left an indelible mark, I couldn't tell you.  I truly believe it was the essence of her being that touched me, inspired me, and stuck with me over the years.  Amazingly, after 35 years, I reconnected with this teacher this past summer.  It was a complete joy to let her know how much of an impact she had on my life.  It was wonderful to simply say "thank you".

Who in your life has sown seeds of love?  It is never too late to express your gratitude.   

Click here to enjoy this week's inspirational click from the Simple Truths website.  Thanks goes out to S.H. from Ellicott City, MD for sending the click.  Make it a great week! 

Nutrition with a Twist: A-"Maize"-Ingly Healthy Corn and Black Bean Salad

Corn, originally uploaded by aelledge86.

Have the basic rules for eating healthier got you stuck in a rut? Each week, The Health and Life Mixing Bowl will serve up some good stuff to expand your nutritional options and perhaps ignite a genuine interest in eating better. Read more about these posts here.

Thanksgiving is less than two weeks away.  Having spent many Thanksgivings at the homes of family and friends, I am always very grateful when the cook prepares a few healthy dishes.  Are you cooking this year?  SamCooks.com has an easy and very healthy recipe for Corn and Black Bean Salad.  This meal is also great for "making and taking".   

2 cups cooked corn kernels (about 3 ears)
1 can (15-ounce) black beans, rinsed and drained
1 cup chopped tomatoes
1/2 cup mild onions, chopped
2 tablespoons chopped cilantro
1 tablespoon lime juice
1 tablespoon rice vinegar or other mild vinegar
2 tablespoons olive oil
Salt and pepper to taste

1) Combine corn, beans, tomatoes, onions and cilantro in a bowl.

2) Mix remaining ingredients in a cup. Pour over corn mixture and toss well. Let sit at least 30 minutes at room temperature. Check for seasoning. Serves 4.

Enjoy!

Give to Others While You Search

Here's a new easy way to raise money for your favorite cause. Just start using GoodSearch.com as your search engine and online shopping mall. GoodSearch donates 50-percent of its revenue to the charities and schools designated by its users.  You use GoodSearch exactly as you would any other search engine. Because it’s powered by Yahoo!, you get proven search results. The money GoodSearch donates to your cause comes from its advertisers — the users and the organizations do not spend a dime!  This is great stuff.  Spread the word!

According to Your World Wednesday

Bring your knowledge, insight, and spirit of contribution as we collectively support each other in experiencing a higher level of wellness.  According to Your World Wednesday is a chance for you to sound off by responding to an inquiry of the week.  Feel free to leave your contact information and/or website/blog address.  And please share this with others!  The more co-activity, the better!  A reminder that each comment will be reviewed before it is posted.  This week's inquiry (time to brag a bit!):

When it comes to health improvement, what are you most proud of?

The Dance: Managing Stress with a Little Practice

Nope, it's not the sun.  Nor is it a poor diet or cigarette smoking.  Stress is the number one aging factor in America, as revealed by Dr. Oz, one of Oprah's medical gurus.

This comes as no surprise to me.  As a 20-year veteran in the health promotion field, I have long been aware of the connection between stress and the acceleration of the aging process.  Click here to see a visual that illustrates how the body responds when under stress. Understanding the physiological underpinnings of the stress response is enough to scare anybody into not sweating the small stuff. And here's the thing: When it comes to stress, the body doesn't discriminate.  An insignificant event, such as traffic, elicits the same biophysical response as a major life stressor.  Big or small, all stress throws the body into the "danger" mode to prepare the body to fight or flee.  This is great if you need to run for your life, but if you are just stuck in a traffic jam, the response can be overkill. 

Every time I begin to "stress" over little things, I remember that being in the "danger" mode, without the necessity to fight or flee, can weaken my major organs, dampen my immune system and destroy my ability to repair cells.  The verdict?  It's just not worth it.  Traffic, children, bosses, mysteriously missing keys, a not so tidy house.  As Dr.Oz mentioned on Oprah, it will be the little things we stress about that kill us.   

There is a preponderance of evidence supporting the practice of relaxation techniques to reduce stress.  Deep breathing, yoga, massage, prayer, bubble baths.....  These are all well known tips I have lectured about for years.  But as a health educator turned life coach, it is my unequivocal belief that managing stress is more about "being" than "doing".  What good is it to act like a maniac all day then hustle over to the yoga class?  It is with our being that we interact with the world and the people, places, and things in it.  This is where stress management should start.  Managing stress is sort of like a dance.  When our being is in step with the life we want to create, "stress" is nonexistent.   

Being in step begins with choices.  Choosing to think differently. Choosing for it to be another way.  Choosing to say no.  Choosing not to get angry, impatient, or resentful.  Choosing a life of gratitude, peace, and love.  Amazing things happen when our being lines up with the life we want to create.  It takes some practice to line things up, but just like learning a new dance, it gets easier with time.    

According to a study conducted by the American Psychological Association, only 35 percent of Americans reporting high levels of stress said they would modify their behavior following the diagnosis of a chronic condition.  Only 35 percent.  What's stopping us from making life-giving choices?  It all starts with the dance.

A New Spin on Workforce Diversity

Each Monday The Health and Life Mixing Bowl will start off the week with an inspirational "click".  Found something you would like to share?  E-mail me!

Here is a little comic relief.   Perhaps this team could use a life coach?  Make it a great week!

Nutrition with a Twist: Sweet Potato Chili

Chili: part 2, originally uploaded by The Foamy Green.

Have the basic rules for eating healthier got you stuck in a rut? Each week, The Health and Life Mixing Bowl will serve up some good stuff to expand your nutritional options and perhaps ignite a genuine interest in eating better. Read more about these posts here.

Here is great recipe for Sweet Potato Chili (vegan dish) from the Duke Student Health Center website. 

3 Tbs canola oil
2 large onions, finely diced
6 garlic cloves, minced
1 red bell pepper, finely diced
1 green bell pepper, finely diced
1 ½ Tbs chili powder
1 ½ tsp ground cumin
1 tsp dried oregano
5 Cups water
1 (28 ounce) can plum tomatoes, finely chopped with juice
¼ Cup tomato sauce mixed with ¼ cup water
2 medium sweet potatoes, peeled and diced into ½ inch pieces
2 (15 ounce) cans black beans, rinsed and well drained
¾ tsp salt

Heat oil in a large stockpot over medium heat; add onions and garlic and sauté.

Stir frequently until onions being at brown, at least 10 minutes.

Stir in peppers and cook 10 minutes, stirring often.

Sprinkle on chili powder and cumin and cook 2 minutes.

Stir in all remaining ingredients and bring to a boil.

Cook 15 minutes or just until sweet potatoes are tender.

Stir occasionally, scraping the bottom of the pot.
Yields 8 servings.

Calories: 200
Fat: 6 grams
Protein: 7 grams
Carbohydrate: 32 grams
Sodium: 770 mg
Fiber: 9 grams

Enjoy!