New Year's Resolutions: A Set Up for a Setback?

"There's a difference between interest and commitment. When you're interested in doing something, you do it only when circumstances permit. When you're committed to something, you accept no excuses, only results." -- Art Turock

I am not a fan of New Year's resolutions.  According to a telephone study conducted by Opinion Research Corporation , more than 75% of U.S. adults, 18 years and older, plan to make one or more New Year's resolutions for 2008. This is despite the fact that, of those who made resolutions for 2007, more than half failed to keep them.  Top resolutions that people made and failed at in 2007 include:

Increase exercise - 51% failed

Eat healthier - 58% failed

Save money - 52% failed

Spend more time with family - 57% failed

Enjoy leisure - 54% failed

There has to be a better conduit for personal change.  Perhaps there is a catch to this whole resolution thing. 

Webster's dictionary defines the word "resolve" as, "the state of reaching a firm decision or a declaration.  Decide.  Declare.  Denounce."  Sounds impressive, but where is the word "commit"?  Where is the part where we act deliberately and intentionally to reach our goals?   

Take a minute and compare last year's resolutions to soulful commitments you have made in the past.  Notice the energy, motivation and drive attached to each.  How was each goal different?  Which became lackluster after a few weeks or months?  Which continue to live today?  Commitment gives goals sticking power.  Perhaps it is a heightened sense of accountability or the desire to preserve personal integrity, but commitments make things real.  Resolve without commitment is like putting the cart before the horse. 

This year, do not let your "resolve" set you up for a setback. Commit to personal change and watch things really take off.  Here are five big payoffs:

You will expect nothing less than success.  Making a resolution is like making a choice.  When you make a choice, you can always change your mind, take a different course of action or find a way out.  Naturally, the degree to which you expect success will remain small.  Making a commitment is like taking a pledge.  A commitment means that the stakes are higher.  Take, for example, the popular New Year's resolution to lose weight.  Thinking small about weight loss can keep thoughts of failure alive.  If you expect your weight loss efforts to be derailed, they will be.  If you expect to stay on track, you will get much more in return.  Commitments keep hope alive, create room for success and set you up for permanent change. 

You will strive for something meaningful and significant.  Most of us commit to worthwhile endeavors.  So the question becomes, what goal is worthy of your time, money and energy?  For example, why start exercising this year?  After all, fitting exercise into a busy schedule can be a major inconvenience.  You might have to put out some extra cash, give up other enjoyable tasks and expend energy you don't think you have.  What will you have in return and what is meaningful about that?  Reaching a smaller clothes size is a great motivator, but for the long haul, the payoff has to be much bigger. What is that for you?  As a short distance runner, I have developed a personally compelling case for running, even in inclement weather (thank goodness for Underarmour).  Barring sickness and family obligations, I run regardless of the weather because the payoff for me is rich and meaningful.  That makes not running not an option.  Similarly, if other life goals do not meet my "run in the rain" criteria, I ditch it.  It' is not worth my time and energy.  Suggestion:  Get clear about what you really want, what is most important to you and build your commitments from there.  Working with a professional life coach is a great place to start.  It will be money and time well invested.   

You will focus on the process rather than the outcome.  The process is where the real gifts are! Resolutions keep you focused on the outcome while commitments keep you grounded in the process.  If you are inspired by the journey, you are much more likely to flirt with trail and error, take calculated risks and embrace your failures as well as your successes.  Living in the journey, moment by moment, can also reveal how other life endeavors are interconnected.  This can make goal attainment an enriching, transforming and enjoyable process. 

You will tap into an energy source that supersedes willpower.  Most resolutions rely on willpower to correct a bad habit, weakness or personality flaw.  By contrast, commitments call forth a bottomless supply of innate strengths, resources and gifts.  What can top that?  Making commitments will keep you operating in the bountiful realm of possibilities rather than in the limited world of circumstances. 

You will stop wondering "if" and start asking "how".  And I believe the universe will offer up a brilliant answer.  W.H. Murray's account of the 1950 Scottish Himalayan Expedition to Mt. Everest is a great reminder of how a strong sense of commitment can bring forth guidance and direction:

".... the moment one definitely commits oneself, then providence moves too. All sorts of things occur to help one that would never otherwise have occurred. A whole stream of events issues from the decision, raising in one's favor all manner of unforeseen incidents and meetings and material assistance, which no man could have dreamed would have come his way."

What do you really want to be different in 2008?

What are you truly ready to stop tolerating?

What stake are you willing to put in the ground?

Here is my challenge to you: 

Boldly separate yourself from the resolution makers, the list keepers, and the wishful thinkers and make an unwavering commitment to improve your health and life in 2008. 

Here is my commitment to you: 

The Health and Life Mixing Bowl will continue to leverage your strengths, resources and gifts.  It will support you in making better, smarter choices, and will continue to inspire, empower and call forth the personal greatness that resides in all of us. 

Here's to an extraordinary 2008!

Comments

[Sara]

You will focus on the process rather than the outcome.

Great advice that can be applied to many different parts of ones life.

By the way, I'm stopping in from the Soup to Nuts Progressive Dinner.

[Deborah Robinson]

This article has been included in the latest edition of the All for Women Blog Carnival, hosted at Australian Women Online.