The Health and Life Mixing Bowl

What are You Working For?

According to this article on CNN.com, the United Nations International Labor Organization find that U.S. workers spend more hours working each year than any other industrialized country. 

We are a bunch of workaholics!

If you look at a pie chart of our lives an see the huge slice that is our work, it gives us pause.  Our job is single largest investment of our time.  And yet, many people hate their jobs.  Or at the very least, find them uninspiring.

Now you may be thinking, "Not everyone can have the job of their dreams!  My job is stable and it pays the bills!  Why rock the boat?"

I'll tell you why:  Because your job in this lifetime is to make the most of what you've been given.  Not just make money. 

Our lifestyles are full of needless spending and earning.  I'm not proposing giving up your mortgages and running off to join a commune.  I'm suggesting re-evaluating how you spend your money so that you can relieve yourself of pressure to just earn, earn, earn.  Focus your energies on something else--perhaps your art, or music or gardening.

The quality of your life can be as much a luxury as a brand new car or the 40 pairs of shoes you hardly wear.  Think about that.  Where can you make changes in your life to give yourself more time and spend less money?

Love Hard

Toy Love, originally uploaded by Capt Kodak.

A lot of divorce happens because people claim they are just "not in love anymore". As if one day, they woke up and the love had disappeared--dissolved like an Alka-Seltzer in the tap water of marriage.

Well, Love is not just a noun. It is a verb. And that means action.

Sometimes you have to do it in order to feel it. Not every day is going to be filled with moonbeams and roses, but as Oprah says, "Love is in the little things". Day-to-day care--like tending a garden--will result in blooms that last for a lifetime.

WikiHow is an online "How To" encyclopedia that teaches people how to do anything from plumbing to cooking to...well...loving.

Their entry under the subject of love has five "steps" as well as several tips; some of which are indeed cheesy, but I think some of them are good reminders to all of us, regardless of what kind of loving relationship we're in--marriage, long-term commitment, parenthood, or friendship.

Make it a Great Day

Sunshine and flowers, originally uploaded by kuddlyteddybear2004.

Here's ten things you can do to take today from just a regular day to a great day:

1. Treat yourself to a cup of gourmet coffee.
It's small thing--relatively inexpensive--but stop on the way in to work today and pick up a cup of excellent gourmet coffee to treat yourself.

2. Take a walk after lunch.
Even if it's 10 minutes down the block and back. Just get out, take some deep breaths and move your body around. Take a friend with you if you can.

3. Find a great joke online and tell it to someone.
The only thin better than a good laugh is sharing it. Need some help finding jokes?

Comedy Central
Jokes Place
Miss Cellania

4. Call your mom. Or husband. Or girlfriend. Just to say you love them.
It doesn't have to be a long call. If they don't answer, leave a message. Just a quickie to say you love them. It will make their day--and you'll feel wonderful.

5. Write a poem.
Don't worry, its not going to be published. You can even throw it away as soon as your write it. Just sit down and do it. It can be funny, or sweet, or even serious and sad. But writing a poem is a great way to exercise your mind and get your thoughts down on paper. If you like it, give it to someone and make their day special, too.

6. Stop and stretch for five minutes.
Not just a weak little stretch--but a good, long, body tingling stretch that gets your blood moving and makes you feel lighter.

7. Make some comfort food for dinner.
What makes you feel good? Chili? Macaroni and cheese? Forget your diet for one day and make yourself something good and warm and comforting for dinner. Just thinking about it all day will make the day better.

8. Practice friendly driving.
Drive time is the worst time of the day for a lot of people. So today, make it a point to be extra courteous to other drivers. Give a little wave and let people cut in front of you. Smile, and relax. Don't plan on getting anywhere fast--just chill and let your good vibes give the rest of the commuters a much-needed boost.

Rituals

Rituals are powerful things.  From the dawn of time people have created sacred space and taken time to recreate important events or pay homage to ancient symbols that have molded their very existence.  Many people in our modern times feel lost and this has been attributed to a significant lack of meaningful ritual in our daily lives.

In our day and age, most of us know that the foundation of many ancient rituals was superstition and a lack of scientific knowledge.  We are not willing to throw reason or logic out the window and sacrifice a goat or toss around some chicken bones with the hope that it will satisfy our soul's longing for spiritual fulfillment.

But a ritual doesn't have to be based on superstition, nor does it have to belong to anyone except you; and it doesn't have to represent a religion or a deity.  A ritual can be something as simple as teas in your back yard each morning, or a bath or long walk on Sunday afternoons.  It is about doing something that represents what is important to you, and doing it on a regular basis--daily or weekly if possible--being mindful of what you're doing and why.

Starting a ritual may seem confining at first.  OR you may feel silly, depending on what it is.  Your friends and family may not fully understand it, but after you've established it, it will become an important part of your life.  You'll find yourself looking forward to your ritual, planning for it, savoring it.  It will become a part of you--and you a part of it.

I'd love to hear comments from people who have rituals, telling me what they do and why it is important to them.

Complaint Free for 21 Days?

"We can throw stones, complain about them, stumble on them, climb over them, or build with them."

-William Arthur Ward

If Pastor Will Bowen has his way, the world will soon be full of people wearing purple bracelets declaring they are complaint and whine free. What a beautiful vision.  So what's wrong with having a little gratuitous whine fest? Isn't venting actually a good thing?  Doesn't it make us feel better?  Studies say no.  Venting can just keep anger and negative emotions alive.  Makes logical sense given that venting is highly addictive. So here comes Pastor Will Bowen and his brainchild, A Complaint Free World, armed with purple bracelets and a 21 day program (scientists believe it takes that long to form a new habit) to abate worldwide complaining.  Here's how it works:

1.  Order a complaint free purple bracelet and wear it on either wrist (3 free bracelets per household)

2.  When you catch yourself complaining, gossiping or criticizing move the bracelet to the other arm. 

Stay with it! It takes most people months to reach 21 days free of complaints. 

And it doesn't stop there!  There are plans to officially proclaim the day before Thanksgiving "Complaint Free Wednesday" to help us prepare for a day of gratitude.  Wouldn't it be great if we proclaimed this a way of life?  So try it!  Go to the Complaint Free World website, order your bracelet(s), and try to stay complaint free for 21 days. 

Your thoughts create your world.  Here's to creating thoughts of gratitude, abundance and joy.      

I Hope You Dance

I woke up this morning to NPR and heard a beautiful poem written by Alice N. Peters. The poem comes from her new book Don't Be a Stranger.  Visit America Public Media's Writer's Almanac to read or listen to it.  It will make you want to dance all day long!

The Creek...Metaphorically Speaking

"The only way to make sense out of change is to plunge into it, move with it and enjoy the dance."

- Alan W. Watts

Three kids and a life coach went tubing last week in the Antietam Creek in Sharpsburg, MD.  The kids had a wonderful day full of fun, friendship and food.  Being the life coach that I am, I finished the day with much more to marinade in. 

Tubing was not as easy as I thought. The creek was full of twists and turns.  The ebbs and flows were unpredictable.  I got stuck on rocks, more than a few times.  I narrowly escaped the dangerous edges filled with snakes and spiders.  There were long stretches of time when I didn't move at all despite my desperate attempt to keep up with the crowd.  My daughter fell out of her tube-twice.  And it rained.  It rained really hard.  At times, there was nothing to do but sit back and surrender to the awesome force of nature.

I desperately wanted to share the deeper meaning of the creek with the little ones.   

But not today.  I let them play....

So my life continues down the creek, going with the flow, moving with it, surrendering to it, and enjoying the dance.

      

Exercising Anyway

All-child play and no workouts make Dad an unfit boy? 

According to a new study released by the University of Pittsburgh, adults ditch their workouts when children arrive.  Sounds a little suspicious to this life coach.  I can't help but dig deeper. 

What is really going on here? 

Is it that most people secretly despise exercising?

Perhaps the perceived overwhelm of parenthood offers a clean way out? 

What other self-limiting beliefs have been given full power here? 

Let's get real.  The truth will set us all free.  The years I spent as a health educator have taught me one important thing:  People don't do anything they aren't compelled to do.  In other words, something like sticking to an exercise program is impossible unless there is a deeper, soulful and purposeful commitment.  Maybe it's time we all re-connected with the real reasons we choose or choose not to stay physically active.  There's a few things we can't ignore: 

• Good health is a key contributor to being able to care for and give fully to children.  Try walking around an amusement park all day in the middle of July (like I did last week) and you'll see what I mean.
• Nine million children in our nation are obese and parental influence can play a pivotal role in changing this.  Walking your talk is important.
• Regular physical activity has been shown to reduce stress and perhaps help parents cope with the demands of raising children, except on those really bad days when an emotional breakdown, a few cookies and a kid-free movie are mandatory. (smile)

My hat goes off to those who play the big game of overcoming circumstances, including the challenges of parenthood, and stay active anyway.  To honor this great feat, here are a few sources of inspiration:      

• Jenny Lauck, a mom blogger, who has vowed to exercise regularly with three kids.  Keep it up, Jenny!
• Penelope Trunk who blogged on not exercising not being an option and regular exercise being an integral part of a successful career and good life.  She has two kids.  Good for you! 
• Miriam Schwab at Illuminea blog who reminds entrepreneurs that our health is our greatest asset.  She also walks the talk with a few kids in tow. Thanks for the inspiration, Miriam!
• Tricia Morgan at RestonBaby.com who gets her workouts in via domestic responsibilities.  Love your creativity, Tricia! 
• The Mocha Walking Club composed of stay-at-home-moms in Kansas and Missouri.
• Alison Korn, a Toronto journalist and guest blogger at On Balance at The Washington Post, who has twins and rises at 6:00 AM to swim.  You go, Alison!
• Justice Fergie at MamaLaw who juggles justice, two kids and regular workouts. 
• All the thousands of moms who juggle changing diapers, mixing bottles and chasing toddlers and still manage to get to strollerstrides, gymboree and mommy and me exercise classes.  I applaud your efforts!
• Yours truly who made exercising a non-negotiable as soon as my daughter was born.  My  Baby Bjorn, bike toddler seat and super stroller have retired, but they are well worn out! 

How do you fit in workouts with children?

I would love to hear from you!

Playing a Big Game: My Father's Day Tribute

On a cold January day in 1965, Alonzo Smith, Jr. welcomed home his second child.  At forty years old with a 11-year old daughter, I am not sure he was up for challenge of an infant.  Unbeknowst to him, a fiercely independent extrovert -- who preferred to dance to the beat of her own drum -- was about to rock his world.  Sound like fun parenting?  Alonzo handled things pretty well.  I actually turned out to be just fine.  There is one thing I will always cherish about my father:  No matter how many crazy ideas I entertained about what I wanted to do when I grew up, he patiently, and lovingly, held the intention of success.  His certainty about my success was big.  What a difference that made for me.  My father died seven years ago.  Although I am unable to return the gift of championing, I do think of ways to hold the life of my father big.  My sister, who is an amazing interior decorator, actually beat me to the punch.  This month, her website features a brilliant display of our father's military medals. The medals, earned for service in World War II, parade a beautiful color palette of sky blue, navy blue, gold, coral and red--all in service of inspiring others to decorate their internal surroundings.  What a wonderful tribute to him.  As a health and life coach, holding the life of my father big means:

• Making the choice to hold people hugely capable of reaching any life goal
• Loving and embracing the unique process of change
• Acknowledging and appreciating who people are and who they are becoming
• Holding back judgment
• Becoming more curious about human nature
• Sowing seeds of co-activity and collaboration
• Being the fruits of patience, goodness and kindness
• Exercising integrity
• Incorporating all of the above in my daily walk as a mother, wife, friend, sister, daughter and coach

Thank you, Dad.  May your legacy  live on.

Playing a Big Game: Patience

  Patience is a virtue.  I really try to live by this proverb, although I did catch myself rapidly tapping my foot as I re-filled the soap dispenser in my powder room today.  Perhaps I need some coaching around that.....  At any rate, my new website has been in the production stage for 13 weeks after the heart-wrenching disappearance of my original site (erased in cyberspace, at least I think.)  Being the optimistic life coach that I am, I was able to identify a few gifts amidst all of this.  I now have a better, bolder and stronger presentation of the vision and mission behind Momentum Health and Life Coaching.  I have a better sense of what I stand for as a life coach and how I want to represent my business.  And thanks to my unbelievable webmasters at nada advertising, I will be able to expand my reach and extend my message of living an extraordinary healthy, balanced and fulfilling life.  How incredibly exciting!  My hope is that the spirit, and the circumstances, from which my new website evolved will bring out the greatness in all us and bring forth the fruits of perseverance and patience.